Parents frequently complain about how much time children spend on their screens. It can become a daily battle for technology, reaching addictive proportions for many children and teens. They seem obsessed with social media, snaps, and games. When denied, they tantrums and rage.
Before the pandemic, I used to advise parents to limit screens to a few hours per week. During the pandemic, the screen was the only access to school and social support. Being held “captive” in quarantine opened the apps and social media again, forcing parents to yield to children’s demands. Now, after the pandemic, I have to help parents with new ways to negotiate screen time.
According to the website, Defend Young Minds, here are 9 questions that can help tackle the technology by setting doable boundaries:
Here are 9 questions to help you establish family screen time boundaries:
- Mealtime. Are devices allowed when we are together at meals at home or at restaurants?
- Being present. Do we allow face-to-face conversations to be interrupted by a phone call or text?
- Time limits. How much screen time should we spend each day?
- Location. Where can devices be used? We strongly recommend that children’s devices are used only in common areas of the house and never in bedrooms or bathrooms.
- Bedtime. Where are devices recharged at night? We recommend that devices be charged in the parent’s room at night or where kids will not have access.
- Asking permission. Do I need to ask before I download apps or games? We recommend utilizing parental controls to disable downloads without permission.
- House rules. When friends come over, what restrictions apply to their devices? Some families use a cell phone basket on a counter to corral devices during the visit.
- Family visits. When and where can we use our devices when visiting friends or family?
- Courtesy. When we are in public, what are the rules for using our devices?
Instead of dictating all of the rules, involve children in the discussion so that they take more ownership. Democracy is better than a dictatorship! Be sure to negotiate consequences for not following the guidelines. Will there be a warning? Parents always have the final word but working together as a family team is the secret to screen management.